Hindsight
Lyrics and Notes

All songs written, performed, recorded, mixed, and mastered by Greg Goldman at Cedar Studios, St. Louis, Missouri.
Cover art by Tim Corner, Martha’s Vineyard, Massachusetts.
Special thanks to: Liz Goldman, Teddy Goldman, Sammy Goldman, Tim Corner, Charlie Campbell, Ben Smith, John Daly, and Brandi Parker.

This album is comprised of one-half songs written in 2020 and one-half songs written seven or more years earlier (the earliest-written song is Away, written sometime around 1995). Thus, it is a combination of songs looking back into the past and songs looking ahead to what’s next. After all, hindsight is 20/20.  - GG

1. Toss it Back
2. Don’t Remind Me
3. Small Miracles
4. What’s the Use
5. Either/Or
6. Anthracite
7. Scissorboy
8. For All Time
9. Away
10. Truth in Hindsight
11. Let Live
12. Mailbox

© Greg Goldman 2020
www.greggoldmanmusic.com


Toss It Back

I try to leave it
But there’s simply no way home
I try to tease it
But I’m feeling it in my bones
And I don’t believe it always
I won’t deceive you anymore
But to pull me apart from you?

I want to see ya’
And just sit the whole storm out
It’s a fever
And I’m hotter than cold right now
I don’t believe I can wait
But then I’ve never been good with restraint
I’m tossing it back to you

I don’t believe you darling
I’ve seen the good and the true
I don’t believe you darling
But what can I do?
So I’m tossing it back to you


Don’t Remind Me

I don’t mind
Just leave it when you’re through
Just leave it when you want to
I don’t mind
I’m behind
I missed if it was fine
To open up my mind
I’m behind

And nothing is the end
And nothing is the last word
There’s nothing to pretend
That would be wrong

I’m on top
At least it’s hard to stop
I’ll stop it when I want to
I’m on top

And nothing keeps me down
And nothing makes me wronger
There’s nothing hanging ‘round
That is my fault

I won’t forget you now
Don’t remind me
I thought a way somehow
Don’t remind me
I won’t forget you now
Don’t remind me
I thought about it all this time
And I’m alive 
So don’t remind me


Small Miracles

So much fighting your nature
But I suppose that it's natural
Wanna push you together
And yet I fear that it's fractural

Pace it out however you have to
You never know when our fate will drag you home

So much responding with anger
But you come by it naturally
And when you process it later
I'm fairly sure it comes back to me

Work it out however you have to 
Just so long as you make it back to home

The very fact that you exist at all
Is to me a miracle

Let me sit and just savor
It won’t be like this all that long
We’ve handed down so much labor
Need to practice at staying strong

Just toss out whatever you have to
We’ll be here when you trace it back to home

The very fact that you exist at all
Honestly is a miracle

Test it out whenever you have to
Just so long as you make it back to home

The very fact that you exist at all
Is to me a miracle


What’s the Use

Well, figure it out
Really, it’s no big deal
Try to be the bigger one
Bigger than the block on what you feel
It’s been such a long time coming; where’s the “aha?”
Just finally pull the trigger

Oh, what’s the use in it?
What’s it all for?
Where’s the tenderness behind the bravado?
I believe in being strong
But I’m ready to be wrong

Part of me shouts
That this is not who we should be
I should know better though
I’ve known you since I could speak
I spent such a long time hoping, wearing you down
It seemed like we’d made some progress

Oh, what’s the use of it?
What’s it all for?
What’s your intention behind the bravado?
I believe I’m in the wrong
But it’s not just the one song

You can huff, you can puff
You won’t blow the whole house down, oh no
You can hope, you can pray
I don’t believe in it anyway, oh no
But time is on your side, I’ll grant you that

Oh, what’s the use in it?
What’s it all for?
Where’s the hopefulness behind the bravado?
What’s the use in it?


Either/Or

I take a piece of something each time that I see red
I got to learn to keep those feelings locked away
I know I’m not the one you had gambled on back then
I understand this way of being’s not okay
It’s not okay

What you feel now
As you’re eyeing the door
Not so different
You and I, either/or

It took a bit of something this time I made the threat
I know you fear the day I walk away
I'm not the only one who has made this all a mess
You understand we each have had a lot to say, a lot to say

What we feel now
As we're stopped at the door
Who will reach out
You and I, either/or

I wanna be free of the weight of the past
Chuck it all, drop the ball, start it over
I have never believed in a straightforward path
But that’s for pros; we’re off the road, we’re off the shoulder
I gotta believe we can make it up again
Take the chance, reach across, turn the corner
You are the one I have loved for so long
It’s not for show, not below any other

What do we do now
As we're stopped at the door
Who will reach out
You and I, either/or


Anthracite

I'm trudging along, both dunce and guiding light
At odds with it all, head guy at the building site
I’ve got the pieces
All scuffs and creases
No big releases
Seasonal increases
I’m part of the calm, faux human anthracite
I’ve got a good hold, it isn’t second sight
It’s somewhat hollow
Not hard to swallow
When one can follow
A real-life Apollo

When you choose who
You will surrender to
You could do worse than me
You could do worse than me

I'm out on the lawn soaking up the fading light
Ignoring the call to shelter in place tonight
Am I essential?
Not deferential
You've got potential
I'll try to be gentle
I’m trying to be calm and pass on something slight
Don’t know how to talk without betraying fright
We’re individuals
Each with our own souls
Skirting the black holes
All accidental

If you must choose
Who to surrender to
You could do a lot worse than me
You could do a lot worse than me


Scissorboy

So you think that you’re alright to be me
You’re successful in your life of plan B
I’d like to see how bad you’ve got to break free
Don’t it kill you to know you’re alive?

You’re not angry when you’re asleep
You’re not in it all too deep
Don’t think you know

So you’ve packed it up, heads 2 out of 3
Cleaned it out and on your way with the key
Won’t you stop and turn once more and tell me
That it’ll kill you to pack so light

You’re not angry when you’re asleep
You’re not in it all too deep
Don’t think you know

You’ll save your answers for the door
There’s more you know, I’m sure,
Than how you feel
And what’s in store for me?
You’re not in it all too deep
Don’t think you know

You’re not in it all too deep
Don’t think you know


For All Time

Here we lay remains of you 
Among the stones and leaves
Welcome home
We couldn't ask for more 
Wouldn't you agree?
Play the role
As awkward as I might be, I'll be fine
Over soon, sooner than you'd think
I know you'd agree
You'd think this wouldn't be really a thing
But all of my life I've been dreaming

All that's done 
For all time
Call you home 
For all time

Place my hand upon your chest 
And whisper close to your ear
Let you go
Been coming for so long
Wouldn't you agree?
Large you loom
For reasons right or wrong
It no longer matters
Let you go as well as I know how
Which isn't that much, but I'll try
The farther I go in my life
And feel you look out through my eyes

All that's done 
For all time
Call you home 
For all time


Away

You’re always thinking
Like someone gets you
Out there somewhere
Or maybe you’re wrong
It’s not so easy
As waiting for what
You know will come soon
Because it won’t

Don’t you think that you might find something better
When you are one?
And just accept it, man, you’ve already met her
So why not move on?

Do not let the past drag on and on behind today
Further on you’ll find a place to put your mind away
Away

Can you remember
The times you felt it
Was strong and feelings
Got a hold of your mind?
But think the things you
Had known would be true
And you will find new
Reason for light

Don’t you think you might find you’re only better
When you are one,
And have a place where you can always find your center
Whenever you want?

Do not let your mind go on and on about the pain
Easy as it is to just relax and count the days away
Away


Truth in Hindsight

All jokes aside, it was ill advised, I will concede
So much for esteem, that became a pipe dream the day when I was freed

And I, I still remember when you turned to go
Your smile, told me everything I hadn’t known
For a while it felt like battling the undertow
But now I see the truth in hindsight

Four grinding years I’ve dealt with all of these fears, and now I’m out the other side
Not that I would claim that I’m all done with self-blame, just not strung out on my pride

And I, I still remember as you walked me out
Petrified, you tried to tell me but I had my doubts
I never said goodbye, but you were not what I was thinking about
I can’t deny
If I was too cruel, I’d do it again
It hardly was enough in hindsight

You and I, we both know, was the lesser loss that day
If they survived, I can only guess at what they thought of me
It was hardly right to make it seem as though I’d run away
It’s on par with the truth in hindsight


Let Live

Come see this spectacle of a nation
Don't believe the fans that flame the horror stories
What can I do in this life, this station?
On stage an avalanche is swallowing our pride

Are we two camps of perfect zealots?
Is there a truth between the mounds of theories?
How can we know to trust those who tell us?
Big dreams but all is lost to greed and foolish pride

I see you, be who you are
I believe you can be more than just an avatar
Do you see me trying to forgive?
Can you believe too?
Live and let live

No healing when we're under pressure 
Honestly but when's that not going to be the story?
What can I do to make you consider
All needs are pressing when we're here on borrowed time?

I see you being who you are
Do you believe too that we are more than just some avatars?
Can you see me working to forgive?
It all depends on you
Live and let live


Mailbox

Okay, alright, I guess that this is one of those times
When I can lower my defense and tell you how I’ve been
I’m fine, sometimes, when I’m trying not to look for the kind
Of security I had with you here, and live

I always knew I’d lose my hold
My sense of where the pieces go
I never knew I’d have to start again

Right now I don’t feel I can talk to you
Right now there’s no one else I want to talk to
And you don’t want to hear I’m here and I’m alone

I’m lost somewhere, can’t find the way to go
And I think that it’s because I’m scared that when I get home
It’s changed, and my name has washed away with the rain
That had fallen when the sun was on break one day

I’ll see you when I come back home
Call when I can stand on my own
I’ll make believe I’m strong enough
To pick you up again

Right now I don’t feel I can talk to you
Right now there’s no one else I want to talk to
And I don’t want to have to feel like I’m alone

Okay, alright, I worry this is one of those times
Where I can lower my defense
And tell you how I’ve been